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Post by ferd on Oct 26, 2021 6:04:55 GMT -7
Thanks man. It still sucks. She and I haven't been very close lately...we don't see eye to eye on much these days...
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Post by chickenpoop on Oct 26, 2021 6:10:14 GMT -7
Dads and daughters tend to have some rough years. The puberty years are hard as hell.
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Post by ferd on Oct 26, 2021 6:14:18 GMT -7
Yeah...she's thirteen.
I feel like I struck out with all three older kids last night.
I got home from work to my 9 year old absolutely losing his mind...find out he gave his sister the finger, shoved his other sister and picked a fight with his older brother.
So I flipped on him and sent him to bed for a while.
Then I read the progress reports for the older kids and took both of their phones due to bad grades.
Baby May and Baby Eli are the only kids on my good list right now and they're just pretty much too young to do anything bad...
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Post by frododoknobo on Oct 26, 2021 6:18:37 GMT -7
You’re a terrible person/father Ferd.
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Post by frododoknobo on Oct 26, 2021 6:20:26 GMT -7
I hated my parents when I got in trouble for doing the wrong thing too. Never hated myself for fucking up.
Funny how that works.
Dad is such an asshole for being mad about me not doing my school work!
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Post by ferd on Oct 26, 2021 6:20:41 GMT -7
Thanks Frodo. That's exactly what I need to hear.
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Post by ferd on Oct 26, 2021 6:22:38 GMT -7
I just sent her a long text message (that she won't get until tonight because she doesn't have her phone).
I don't know what to do to get her to shape up...she has been late for school 21 times this year, and her grades are bad. She just doesn't care.
I know she has anxiety and is probably depressed...we're going to get her in to a doctor to see if medication will be right for her...she's been seeing a counselor for months but that doesn't seem to be improving anything.
I feel like a failure as a parent.
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Post by ferd on Oct 26, 2021 6:23:35 GMT -7
On a side note...how can you be late 21 times and not face any consequences from the school?!?!
I don't get it.
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Post by Zeewada on Oct 26, 2021 6:27:29 GMT -7
Fred, you probably arent a failure. Just another challenge. How old is she?
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Post by higs on Oct 26, 2021 6:27:30 GMT -7
Vibes ferd.
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Post by chickenpoop on Oct 26, 2021 6:29:25 GMT -7
If your teenage kids aren't mad at you sometimes, you're doing something wrong. You know which teens think their parents are cool? The ones who have parents who let them party and do whatever the fuck they want. Be happy being a good dad and not a cool one.
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Post by chickenpoop on Oct 26, 2021 6:30:55 GMT -7
So, in summary Ferd = good dad Ferd = not cool
Lololol
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Post by frododoknobo on Oct 26, 2021 6:39:35 GMT -7
Thanks Frodo. That's exactly what I need to hear. You’re doing the right thing, even if it bums you out.
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Post by deadphishbiscuits on Oct 26, 2021 6:42:34 GMT -7
In a yelling mad voice say
Well..I love you! And always will!
She may go..¿Da fuq?
Then marinate on it and change her flavor (tune/attitude)
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Post by deadphishbiscuits on Oct 26, 2021 6:44:11 GMT -7
And 21 days late, damn...what kind of bus drivers yall got out that way?
Otto even got the Simpson kids to school on time
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Post by Don Swifty on Oct 26, 2021 6:51:07 GMT -7
Vibes ferd. Parenting is tough. Not that I have first-hand experience. Just know I was a handful at that age.
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Post by ferd on Oct 26, 2021 6:54:36 GMT -7
And 21 days late, damn...what kind of bus drivers yall got out that way? Otto even got the Simpson kids to school on time -Legs takes the kids to school everyday.
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Post by ferd on Oct 26, 2021 6:56:11 GMT -7
Thanks everybody. I'm most certainly not cool...
She's 13...and she used to be the best student in her class...last year she failed 2 classes and had to take summer school. The pandemic has been rough on her for sure but she is like a totally different person these days.
I want to smooth things over but still want her to know that her attendance and grades are unacceptable.
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Post by Don Swifty on Oct 26, 2021 6:59:49 GMT -7
If your teenage kids aren't mad at you sometimes, you're doing something wrong. You know which teens think their parents are cool? The ones who have parents who let them party and do whatever the fuck they want. Be happy being a good dad and not a cool one. I had a gf whose mom was a world travelling hippie turned slacker. She told me they had all sorts of issues when she was younger (though they got along great later in life). She craved the structure that was missing from her life. Would've liked to have felt more important in her mom's life. I remember she told me once she was a bit jealous of those kids who get home from school and their mom's prepare them an after-school snack. She often had to fend for herself. California girl went totally against the whole W. Coast hippie ethos. Hated the Dead, loved the Velvet Underground from NYC and punk. She was into Phish like we are, but she at least accepted them, liked some tunes, and came out on ter. Kids are like everyone else. Want what they can't have, don't want what they have. Grass is always greener at your friend's house who have uninvolved/involved parents. Etc.
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Post by chickenpoop on Oct 26, 2021 7:15:40 GMT -7
Give that girl some goals (get the grades up, etc.) and a bribe. Positive reinforcement yields the best results. Just like with doggos.
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